On a hilltop with fifteen girls and no cares to think of

I like to fill out surveys when I'm drunk because the barriers come down and I'm honest and pure and squishy good. This particular survey was not lifted from MySpace but rather, was sent to me via e-mail by my dear friend Annie R. with instructions that I fill this out to let my friends get to know me better. Well. You're my friend and I want you to get to know me better. I like Jameson Irish whiskey. Know that before we begin.

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01. What is your occupation?
I'M IN THE LIBRARY BIZ. I'M ALSO IN THE FREELANCE MUSIC JOURNALISM BIZ. I'M IN THE VIDEO/MEDIA ART BIZ. I'M IN THE NIGHTLIFE BIZ TOO.

02. What color are your socks right now?
MY SOCKS ARE A FADED SHADE OF BLACK WITH A GRAY AND BLACK ARGYLE PATTERN RUNNING THE LENGTH OF MY FIBULA.

03. What are you listening to right now?
I HAVE THE PANDORA.COM THINGAMABOB RUNNING FULL THROTTLE WITH A SELECTION OF EARLY 80'S AMERICAN HARDCORE. CUZ WHEN YOU'RE DOING PAPERWORK, ONLY THE BAD BRAINS MAKE SENSE.

04. What was the last thing that you ate?
I JUST HAD A BANANA AND IT WAS DELICIOUS.

05. Can you drive a stick shift?
YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT. I DRIVE ALL KINDS OF THINGS. SOME BETTER THAN OTHERS BUT I CAN. HOWEVER, SOME PEOPLE PREFER CARS THAT SHIFT THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY LIKE LUXURIOUS COMFORT. YOU EVER HEARD OF CADILLAC?

06. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
SALMON PINK. THAT SHIT'S EDIBLE!

07. Last person you spoke to on the phone?
HARRY, CONCERNING A PACKAGE THAT WAS DOUBLE-DELIVERED.

08. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
I LOVE ANNIE R. LIKE A SISTER. I LOVE HER VERY MUCH.

09. How old are you today?
TODAY I AM HALFWAY THROUGH THE SUCK THAT IS THIRTY. TOMORROW I'LL BE TWENTY-FIVE AGAIN.

10. Favorite drink?
ALL OF THEM.

11. What is your favorite sport to watch?
FÚTBOL. GOLF. TENNIS. CLAM DIGGING. FUCKING. SPELUNKING. HISTORICAL LESSONS. ANTIC DISPOSITIONS. POETRY. FUNERALS. MIXED-MARTIAL ARTS. FUCKING.

12. Ever dyed your hair?
WHEN I WAS YOUNG AND SLIGHTLY MORE "PUNK" ROCK.

13. Pets?
USED TO HAVE SOME GOOD ONES. HANSEL WAS AN ADORABLE AND LOYAL SCHNAUZER. SPARKY WAS A SPUNKY DOBERMAN PINSCHER. OTTO WAS A FUCKING PHENOMENAL ROTTWEILER. MY OLD LOVEBIRDS GIN & TONIC WERE CUTE. MY GOLDFISH (OTTO II, ROMMEL, ALFRED, BISMARCK, AND MENGELE) DEFIED MANY LAWS OF NATURE AND YES, AT THE TIME I THOUGHT THAT NAMING THEM WITH NAZI OVER/UNDERTONES WOULD BE FUNNY. C'MON! THEY WERE GOLDFISH! PLUS ALFRED WAS PURE GOLD WITH A BLACK MARK ON HIS "LIP" -- HOW COULD I RESIST?!

14. Favorite food? Dessert?
ALL EXCEPT THE BIG THREE: COTTAGE CHEESE, PRUNES AND LIVER (STEAK). DON'T TRY TO MAKE ME ENJOY THESE. I HAVE TRIED THEM ALL COUNTLESS TIMES AND EVERY TIME SUCKED.

15. Last movie you watched?
THE DARJEELING LIMITED WHICH WAS VERY NICE.

16. Favorite Day of the year?
TOMORROW. YESTERDAY. TWO WEEKS FROM APRIL. WHATEVER.

17. What do you do to vent anger?
SIT AND PATIENTLY WAIT FOR IT TO PASS THROUGH AND ABOVE ME.

18. What was your favorite toy as a child?
THOSE MAZINGER Z TOYS WERE THE BOMB. OTHER THAN THAT, I CAN'T REALLY RECALL.

19. What is your favorite season fall or spring?
FALL IS FOLLOWED BY WINTER AND WINTER IS RUINED BY SPRING WHICH IN TURN IS FURTHER RUINED BY SUMMER. THEREFORE I LIKE WINTER.

20. Hugs or kisses?
BOTH. SLOPPY HUGS AND TIGHT KISSES.

21. Cherry or Blueberry?
ALL BERRIES ARE GOOD. WORKING ON SOME NICE RASPBERRY MAYONNAISE RIGHT NOW FOR A CERTAIN KIND OF SANDWICH I WANNA MAKE. YUM!

22. Do you want your friends to email you back?
SURE. FIND MY E-MAIL UNDER MY PROFILE AND E-MAIL AWAY. DO AS YOU PLEASE. THIS BLOG IS FOR YOU. SERIOUSLY. WHY ELSE?!

23. Who is most likely to respond?
PEOPLE IN THE WORLD.

24. Who is least likely to respond?
THE DEARLY DEPARTED. THE BEREAVED. THE LONELY.

25. Living arrangements?
THEY COME TO A CLOSE SOON. BUT RISE SOON IN A MUCH BETTER PAD WITH THE SAME CAST. JESSE IS A GREAT FRIEND AND A FORMIDABLE ROOMMATE.

26. Last time you cried?
WAS A LONGTIME AGO AND WHEN I THINK OF UGLY THINGS, I THINK OF THOSE DAYS. YEEUCH.

27. What is on the floor of your closet?
SHOES. BOXES. AN IRON.

28. Who is the friend you have had the longest that you are sending this to?
THE WORLD IS MY OLDEST FRIEND.

29. The friend you have had the shortest that you are sending this to?
I GUESS THAT WOULD BE YOU. SINCE I'M SENDING THIS TO CLOG THE DIGITALSCAPES OF THE INTERNET. INTERNET PLUMBERS DO IT IN THE OPTIC FIBERS.

30. Favorite smell?
A WOMAN.

31. What inspires you? to do what?
INSOMNIA. TO DO MANY GREAT THINGS. LIKE THIS BLOG, WHICH IS CLEARLY THE HALLMARK OF MY ENTIRE CAREER IN THE WORLD. EVERYTHING HAS LED TO THIS MOMENT. THIS IS MY CROWNING ACHIEVEMENT. THIS MAKES ME.

32. What are you afraid of?
ROACHES. LIKE ANY SANE PERSON.

33. Plain, cheese or spicy? on what?
CHEESILY PLAIN WITH AMPLE SPICE ON ANYTHING. C'MON!

34. Favorite car?
MY ÜBER-CUTE NISSAN VERSA ROCKS THE HOUSE.

36. Number of keys on your key ring?
ENOUGH FOR WHAT I NEED.

37. How many years at your current job?
AT LIBRARY: SEVEN. FREELANCING: NINE. PUTZING AND ASSORTED SHENANIGANS (OF THE JESSE AND NON-JESSE-ASSISTED VARIETY): FIFTEEN.

38. Favorite day of the week?
NO PREFERENCE. THERE ARE DRINK SPECIALS EVERY NIGHT YEAR ROUND IN THE MAGIC CITY. THAT'S ALL YOU NEED. BY THE BY, THE DATRAN CENTER PUBLIX LIQUOR STORE HAS A GOOD DEAL ON THE JAMESON. SCOOP UP ONE OR TWO.

39. How many states have you lived in?
IN THE UNITED STATES, ONE. ELSEWHERE, TWO.

40. How many countries have you been to?
TWENTY-FOUR AND THERE ARE SO MANY MORE I WANT TO VISIT!

41. What was your favorite country?
ALL OF THEM WERE GREAT. ALTHOUGH BELGIUM GETS CREDIT FOR HAVING THE HOTTEST PUNK ROCK GIRLS OF AFRICAN DESCENT. YEEOW!

42. If you could go back in time and change anything you have ever done or
said what would it be?
CHANGING MY PAST NULLIFIES THE PRESENT. I LIKE MY PRESENT VERY MUCH REGARDLESS OF HOW MUCH I BITCH AND ELECTRONICALLY SCREAM. EVERYTHING THAT HAS COME HAS PASSED AND WHAT HAS NOT COME BEARS NO BEARING ON MY NOW.

WELL, I'M PLEASANTLY BORED NOW. I HOPE YOU ARE TOO. DIGI CAM ASSISTANCE COMING SOON. RIDE THE PALOOKAVILLE EXPRESS FREQUENTLY.